Tracy Thomas

My life has changed so much on the 10th december 2008 my oldest daughter took her own life I am trying to be positive nothing we will do will ever change what has happened but I can be positive and try and move on never forgeting I love her forever but knowing I can try and help other people

My list of friends and GTS memorials is ever growing I guess people will wonder why I add so many because we are an ever growing number that mourn the suicide of a loved one when I started my journey on 10th Dec 08 I did feel alone like many others that join gone too soon. I guess it has become my way of telling many others we are not alone on this sad journey we will not be the first or the last to take it feel free to add me as a friend I accept all invites no matter where you are or who you are.


no matter where you are we will try to help even if its just by talking

How We Survive
-----------------
If we are fortunate,
we are given a warning.

If not,
there is only the sudden horror,
the wrench of being torn apart;
of being reminded
that nothing is permanent,
not even the ones we love,
the ones our lives revolve around.

Life is a fragile affair.
We are all dancing
on the edge of a precipice,
a dizzying cliff so high
we can't see the bottom.

One by one,
we lose those we love most
into the dark ravine.

So we must cherish them
without reservation.
Now.
Today.
This minute.
We will lose them
or they will lose us
someday.
This is certain.
There is no time for bickering.
And their loss
will leave a great pit in our hearts;
a pit we struggle to avoid
during the day
and fall into at night.

Some,
unable to accept this loss,
unable to determine
the worth of life without them,
jump into that black pit
spiritually or physically,
hoping to find them there.

And some survive
the shock,
the denial,
the horror,
the bargaining,
the barren, empty aching,
the unanswered prayers,
the sleepless nights
when their breath is crushed
under the weight of silence
and all that it means.

Somehow, some survive all that and,
like a flower opening after a storm,
they slowly begin to remember
the one they lost
in a different way...

The laughter,
the irrepressible spirit,
the generous heart,
the way their smile made them feel,
the encouragement they gave
even as their own dreams were dying.

And in time, they fill the pit
with other memories
the only memories that really matter.

We will still cry.
We will always cry.
But with loving reflection
more than hopeless longing.

And that is how we survive.
That is how the story should end.
That is how they would want it to be.