Does anyone else feel that you have to be tactful, and not talk too much in company about your child that has passed on? I feel that I have to be careful by who and when I talk about Beki, as other people have their own lives, they just don't want to know sometimes.
I try now not to mention about Beki in certain company. I guess I talk about Beki alot as for me it is keeping her memory alive. I am so proud of all she had achieved in her short but full life.
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RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
no hun i talk about my dad and brother alot even to my mum who is remarried to someone else if he dont like it tough really as why should you have to be tactful hun beki is your child and you should be able to talk about her to whoever whenever you want xxxxxxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
I have had people tell me that they don't want to hear about her and that I should look to the future it hurt me very much but I stopped and realised that some people don't want to know and that is the way things are, I just have to be careful now who I talk to about her I guess
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
Me and my family talk about my daughter, Stacey all the time, sometimes as if she hasn't even gone. At first my eldest son got very upset when her name was brought up, or when a song she loved came on, or if he saw some of her stuff lying around. But now we are all able to talk about her with a smile. For she was a beautiful person and yes, she's died, but she's alive somewhere else.
I am kind of careful about how much I talk about her to other people though, in case it makes them feel uncomfortable as they don't know how to talk about her back or what to say in case it upsets me.
Take care, Denise xxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
well you always know you have friends on here to talk to hun if you need us xxxxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
i know what you mean and im getting it from family im trying my best to get on with my life but i dont want to get over over it so soon and i like to do and get things in my angels memeory i wouldnt mind but my sister lost three my mum lost 20 children and its them i thought would understand more but they dont so sorry for how you are made to feel xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
I cant bring nadia's name up with most of my family cause they just change the subject and some will tell me i should have moved on by now,thank god for g.t.s at least here i can talk about my baby girl and be understood all my love gabrielle xxxxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
I know exactly how you feel mate. Always having to tiptoe around others feelings so they are not upset or uncomfortable. Thank goodness for this site for our children are not a sticky topic here. I find that I just choose the people I speak to carefully and avoid others. I figure you get the best of me when I can be honest and you loose out if I have to tiptoe around you. To those people every answer is short and non specific. I don't begrudge these people but as I said a lot of the time they don't get shown the real me. Take care love.xxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
H Rachel, I felt the same way as you when Stephen first died no one in the family or friends wanted to talk about Stephen even after nearly 10yrs my other son still won't talk about Stephen but hey it doesn't stop me talking about him, like you say it keeps his memory alive, if they don't want to talk about Stephen thats just tough for them, nothing in the world would ever stop me talking about my beautiful son who by the way gave me a beautiful grandson who i am very proud of, all the same i would not have been able to cope if it wasn't for the gonetoosoon site and the the lovely people who are in the same boat as you. God Bless you all xxx
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
I was told by my mother-in-law that I wasn't allowed to be sad once they found out that my partner's brother was expecting. 6 weeks after burying my baby, I was no longer allowed to speak about him, or grieve for him in their presence.
I understand how you feel and I'm sorry for your loss x
RE: Our special children and when we can talk about them
you should all talk about your angel,s as much as you want. these people that tell you not to be sad are so selfish godbless you all and each and everyone of your precious angels xxxx
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