Me and my husband have 2 beautiful children, but we are currently mourning the loss of Angels. We have lost 2 within 5 months.
Our first angel was taken from me on 1st April 2009 via ERPC. It had passed on at 5wks gestation. I found out I was preg again 2months later. I asked doctors and midwives for an early scan but was denied them and told that there was no reason for a second miscarriage. I had my HCG levels checked at 10wks and was told that they were "normal". I later found out they should have been checked again 24hr later.
We had our 12wk scan on 1st Sept 09. I had already suffered 2 big bleeds and it was confirmed that our baby had passed at 6wks.
Will the pain and heartache of miscarrying so early in to a pregnancy ever go away? I miss my babies so much and it seems that everyone I know is pregnant and its soul destroying. We are very scared about trying again. I don't think I could cope with losing another baby :0( xxx
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RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
Rachel, I am so sorry for the loss of your angels. I miscarried our first child in May this year. I was 6 weeks. It absolutely devastated me. A loss is hard at any stage - it doesnt matter if you were 6 weeks or 6 months. You have lost something very much wanted. Personally, I am a very visual person, so not having even had an u/s was and is very hard for me to come to terms with. I buy lots of stuff in memory of my baby. Not everyone will agree with me here, but my partner and I named our baby (I am convinced she is a girl) as I have found it easier to cope.
Everyone I know IS pregnant atm - 20 of them exactly, due between last month and Memphis' due date in January :( xxxxx
I know I will never forget my daugther, she will always be my oldest and firstborn.
Hope you are feeling better soon hunni, and if you need to talk, Im always here xxxxxxxxxxx
RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
Nicole, thank you so much for your reply.
I am so sorry for your loss of Memphis (I love her name!).
I got to see my first angel on a U/S but I refused to look at the U/S of our second angel. It should have been our 12wk scan and we should have seen a healthy baby. Instead we were being told that we had lost our baby.
I believe that both the children I lost were boys. I don't know why....just a gut feeling.
My husband brought me a Pandora charm bracelet for our 1st Wedding Anniversary (a month after we had our first angel taken from us). On my bracelet is 2 little angels, so my babies will forever be with me.
I have had to take some time ot of work and I know it will be extremely hard going back. Especially as 2 ladies I work with are pregnant. 1 is due 9days after our first angels due date, the other is due the day after our 2nd angels due date.
Is it normal to feel jealous and envious of friends who are pregnant?
I'm having a bit of a low day again today....do these days pass? xxx
RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
Aww hunni, you sound like me :( I couldnt imagine losing 2, my heart goes out to you! xxxxxxx I did the opposite to you - I only had 3 days off work and then went back. I work in hospitality so the days werent long, and I thought it would be a good distraction, as all i was doing at home was crying and thinking about it as i have no other children. Like you, I went back to work to one who had just come off maternity leave, and one pregnant who has just left on sunday. At first, I couldnt look at anyone pregnant and hated seeing newborns :( I still do to some extent (especially when having a low day). Out of the 21 people i know pregnant - there are only 3 I am truly excited and happy for. One being my very first godchild due dec 31st xxxxx only 4 days after my dd. I think i am coping ok - my counsellor says i am going well. I think seeing my godchild in hospital wii be the hardest, knowing that should be me within 4 days of her, but she knows what I went through and has been excellent.
Its still early days for me as well, but I find I am having some better days already, and then I will have really bad days. I have been told it does get easier hunni, that I will never forget her (thanks for the comment on her name, partner choose it)I have to go to bed hunni, its 1:35am here and i have to start work at 11am :(
I hope today is gentle on you, and that I have helped in some small way. Feel free to add me as a friend, or send me a message. Are you on FaceBook?? If so, add me there too. I am under the same as on here Nicole Arthur xxxxx
Floaty kisses to all our Angels! xxxxxxxxxx
RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
Thank you again for your response. I'm grateful for the 2 children we already have otherwise I think losing both our angels would be a lot harder to deal with.
I had to have an ERPC with my first angel and only took a week off work. I went back too quickly and ended up with an infection and was in a lot of pain. This time my doctor has signed me of work. Although I know what you mean about work being distracting. I work in payroll, so am pretty busy a lot of the time, and some days I wish I was there rather than at home thinking about my babies.
Its nice to hear that it does get better...and you will never forget them.
I am on Facebook so will look for you now. Go get some sleep. Sweet dreams and thank you again xxx
RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
hi my name is georgina i am so very sorry to here ov the loss you have suffered no one knows why these things happen or can understand what goes wrong i no that you must be going through hell right now but you must stay strong in cases like this there is no one to blame at this time these little angels just werent strong enough to get to us safely if you have not already a specialy trained counciler would be a good idea as it really helps you to let it all out there is no reason for you to not have a normal pregnence but for now let your body recover and rest and before you try again speak to the hospital
RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
im so sorry for your losses i msscarried at 14 weeks and the pain is soo bad im lucky anough to hav got to hold my princess ect
but i beleve it doesnt matter if you was 5weeks pregnant or yur child is 24 when a child dies no matter the age it hurst sooo much as its yor child your future.. when i misscarryed i got lots of comments like.. try again or atleast you was only 14 weeks.. they hurt soo much .. yeh i can try again but that wont change the fact your child has died and no its a dead it doesnt matter if i wa only 14weeks gone.. im hear if you want to chat
all my love xxxxxxxx
RE: Early Preg Miscarriage
Thank you for all your comments.
Shona...when we lost our first angel we had exactly the same reponse. We got all the comments about trying again, and how we weren't that far along etc. A lot of our families were not supportive of our pregnancy. They didn't understand why we would want more children when we have 2 children already, and one of each at that. It has always been my dream to have a big family and I don't understand why our families could not accept that.
When we discovered we were pregnant again we decided to keep it to ourselves. We thought everything would be ok. I started bleeding 2 days before our 12wks scan and at what should have been a happy time, instead of telling our families that we were expecting a baby, we were telling them that we had lost another child.
Both the babies that we have lost had not developed a yolk sac and therefore I believe that they were obviously starved of the nutrients they needed.
Georgina - I think it might do me good to speak to someone. I have friends who have gone through this, but I still feel that they truly do not understand me. Is that strange? I will mention this to my doctor when I see her this week.
Thank you again for your comments. I'm so glad I have this website to come to xxx
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